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(1925 - )
| Category | Quote | E-Mail this quote |
|---|---|---|
| Death | For three days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off. | |
| Democracy | Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president. | |
| Fairness | If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead. | |
| Food | If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners. | |
| Insults | Nancy Reagan fell down and broke her hair. | |
| Insutls | She doesn't need a steak knife. Rona cuts her food with her tongue. - (on Rona Barrett) |
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